Contingent Page 5

  “No one. Kennedy and I were roommates before she married Caleb.” I spoke to Landon, but my attention was focused on the person standing in the kitchen looking directly at me. My eyes locked on Peyton’s for a second before I looked back at Landon and smiled.

  “Ah, and here I thought you were here with Haas.”

  “No.” I lowered my head. “He and I are no longer a thing.”

  “I see.”

  “Nor do I want to talk about it.”

  Peyton didn’t own me anymore. He left me and was now in the arms of another woman. There was no sense worrying what others thought or hoping he would find me again. It was time to take a look at my life—and to continue moving forward.

  “I wasn’t going to ask.” He lifted his hands as if to defend himself. “I was actually going to ask if I could take you out sometime.”

  From my peripheral, I knew Peyton was still watching. I sensed his eyes on me. “I’d like that. But I have to be honest, Landon. I’m not ready for anything serious.”

  “We can be friends.” He gave me a boyish grin. If my heart wasn’t shattered, I might have had butterflies. Landon retrieved his cell from his back pocket and handed it over to me. I added my number to his contact list and hit the call button so I had his number in mine.

  Landon and I sat on the couch, looking out at the ocean. Prior to Peyton, I couldn’t recollect the last time I had a conversation with a man I was interested in.

  Am I interested in Landon?

  I couldn’t deny it. He was extremely sexy and had enough swagger that he could have any girl wrapped around his finger. So yes, I was physically attracted to him. Any girl would be. He seemed kind, attentive, and never pushed me to talk about Peyton. But my heart belonged to someone else.

  I left Landon on the couch and headed inside to use the restroom and pick up some food. Hopefully, Peyton and the twiddle witch were long gone. I slid open the glass door, and focused on locating the small half-bathroom located in the foyer. I resisted the urge to glance in every direction to see if they were still there.

  Please don’t be occupied.

  Whispering a silent prayer, I turned the door handle for the guest bathroom—it was locked.

  Fuck.

  “Lynnie, there’s one right up the steps,” Kennedy called from the kitchen.

  When I reached the final landing, my heart was accelerating with nerves. I had heard Devon’s voice while climbing the stairs. He was somewhere nearby and it was only a matter of time before I saw him again.

  I turned the bathroom doorknob at the same time the person inside pulled the door open. I apologized and let Kennedy’s coworker pass, then locked the door behind me. After using the restroom, I stood in front of the sink, splashing cool water on my face.

  Get a grip, Wolf. He’s just a guy. A guy who broke your heart more than once. A guy who is an asshole. A coward.

  It wasn’t wise to let him control how I acted around my friends. This was my best friend’s party and I had spent most of the time ignoring her because I was too afraid to see him. I found myself walking along the banister, searching the crowd below. Looking specifically for him so I would have the upper hand.

  “Lynn?” he called from behind me, his voice a low whisper.

  I twirled, my heart rate picking up with each second. “What are you doing?” I was annoyed that he had tracked me down before I found him.

  “I was waiting for you. We need to talk.”

  “No.” I stepped back. “We’re adults. You’re a grown ass man hiding in a bedroom, waiting for me to leave the bathroom so we can talk. All the while whispering so your girlfriend doesn’t hear us.” I turned to walk away, but his fingers laced around my upper arms.

  “We need to talk.” He pulled me into the empty guest bedroom. “I saw you with Landon. I don’t want you seeing him.”

  I laughed and tugged my arm from his firm grasp. He looked delectable in his white button down and jeans. I ignored the pinch in my heart and pushed hard against his chest. “You’ve made it very clear that we are over, so now it’s my turn.”

  My words slipped through gritted teeth. “I’m not yours, buddy. Not anymore. I don’t have to do what you want. I don’t go to places or stop walking because you want me to. And if I decide to see someone else, it’s none of your damn business. I. Am. Not. Yours. Anymore. You can’t claim me. This is over. You. Chose. This.”

  I turned on my heels to walk away but was again stopped by his grip. This time he wasn’t asking. I was halfway past the bedroom door before he dragged me inside and slammed the door, holding me against it.

  He closed the space between us, his hands caging me in. My right hand swung up and slapped him. My skin burned where it connected with his face. When he didn’t speak or move, I lifted my hand to hit him again.

  “Don’t!” He moved in closer so his lips were mere centimeters from mine and spoke under his breath. “Or I’ll punish you.”

  His eyes locked on mine as I searched his for an answer. When he didn’t speak again, I let my eyes close, feeling the warmth of his breath on my skin. His nose grazed across my cheek.

  I held my breath, waiting for his lips. Waiting for him.

  “You will always be mine, Lynn. The way your heart beats, each steady thump, that’s for me. I never meant to hurt you.”

  “But you did,” I whispered.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “That’s not good enough.” I opened my eyes, looking directly into his. Haas’s lips pressed against the tears on my cheek.

  “Please don’t cry.”

  “Leave me alone,” I cried in his arms. My forehead rested on his. “Please, Haas, I can’t do this. You said you’d had enough—that it wasn’t working out for you. So please, I’m begging you. I can’t get over you unless you leave me alone. Go be with her—”

  He pressed his lips to mine.

  My tears, my whimpers, and his grunts mixed together in a bowl of emotion. I was weak and unable to push him away. Instead, I let my lips mold to his. He had always been my weakness, my addiction.

  “Please . . . Come back to me,” I moaned when his lips moved to my neck. Haas stopped and looked at me.

  Reality crashed in.

  “I need go.” He pushed off the wall and left the empty room.

  I slid down the wall to the floor, holding my swollen lips. In an empty room, I let my heart break again. Peyton Hass had broken my heart put it back together only to tear it apart yet again.

  I was now empty . . . alone . . . fighting my demons.

  Peyton

  My fingers wrapped around the leather of the steering wheel. The sound of passing cars kept my mind clear. I was closer to home and further away from Braelynn. Filled with anger and self-hatred, I stepped harder on the accelerator. I had lost my composure; I had followed her to the bathroom and waited for her. She was my greatest desire, my weakness, but she was no longer available to me.

  Not by choice.

  I had to rid my thoughts of Braelynn and focus on Devon. She and I were compatible; it only made sense that we would be together.

  “That house was so tiny. Did you notice there were, like, only five bedrooms?”

  Devon’s valley-like tone distracted me from my thoughts. Devon was educated, a philanthropist, but when her bratty privileged side came out, the valley girl joined the annoying party. I pressed the accelerator again, ignoring the conversation she was trying to start.

  “And her friends. Eww! Seriously, if she is going to live within our social group, she should really get new friends. She married Caleb, for crying out loud. I’m shocked he agreed to that house and having those people there.”

  “Devon.” I turned my head to face her, my teeth biting the sides of my tongue so I wouldn’t disrespect her in the car.

  “Yes, honey?” She looked my way with excitement. I couldn’t tell if it was because this was the first time I’d spoken to her in the past forty-five minutes or that she thought I was going to join her in b
ashing Kennedy.

  “Shut up.”

  She ignored my request. “What’s the matter? Does your head hurt?” Placing her hand on my thigh, she leaned forward. “Do you need anything from me?”

  “Your voice. That’s what’s making my head hurt.” My hand dropped from the sterling wheel and removed her hand as though it were a dead bird.

  “Gosh, do you have to be a dick all the time? You saw your little fling talking to Landon and now you’re in a sour mood.”

  Devon knew exactly what to say to push my buttons.

  “She wasn’t a fling.” I tried to keep my cool. We were still a good hour from the city and the last thing I needed was her nagging the whole time.

  “Whatever.” She lowered the visor and checked her hair in the mirror. “She’s an opportunist. At least you came to your senses and dumped the white trash whore. It didn’t take her long to move on to someone else with a pretty bank account.” She shut the mirror and looked at me with pouting lips.

  I steered the car to the emergency lane so I could gather myself and not leave Devon stranded on I95. I needed to keep Devon happy, but my sanity was walking a thin line. When the car came to a complete stop, I twisted in my seat so that I faced her. “I don’t ever want you speaking ill of Braelynn. Not in front of me or anyone else. If you ever use her name in vain again, we are through.”

  “But—”

  “But nothing, Devon. She and I didn’t work out, but I will not tolerate you trashing her. You wanted me by your side—I’m here. We’re a couple. You got what you wanted. But if you talk about her again, I will walk away.”

  Devon knocked on my office door a week after Braelynn and I broke up. She’d insisted I join her for lunch and didn’t once mention Braelynn. In fact, she’d seemed normal—surprisingly normal.

  Dating Devon had its advantages. She lived and worked in Washington DC, so her time in New York would be limited. For the past three weeks, she had been in DC, but then I got a phone call that she was here for a long weekend. I’d sent a car to pick her up at JFK and used work as an excuse to not spend time with her on Friday night. Since she knew about Caleb and Kennedy’s housewarming, she had insisted we attend.

  “Geez, Peyton. Makes me wonder why you came back to me after all these years if you’re still so caught up with her.”

  “You and I share the same world. That’s all.”

  I pulled back into traffic and drove back to New York City in silence. Devon played with her phone, pouting like a five-year-old who didn’t get her way. I pulled up in front of the hotel she was staying at, put the car in park, and waited for her to get out. Devon wasn’t ugly; she could have any man she wanted. And at one point in my life, I’d enjoyed being around her, despite her attitude and her evil tongue. Somewhere deep in her Satan soul there was a good person, but she would never be Braelynn.

  Her eyes met mine as she swung her purse onto her shoulder. “Aren’t you spending the night?”

  “I have to get to the office. I had a client call during the party. He needs to see me right away.” I lied.

  “But I leave for DC tomorrow.” Her voice was whiny.

  “I know, and I won’t be back late. We can do brunch tomorrow morning before you leave.”

  “I want a little more than brunch.” She leaned forward to kiss me goodbye.

  I pressed my lips to hers and pulled away. “You got it. Now go.”

  “You’ll come back tonight?”

  “Yes, Devon. My apartment is being painted. Of course, I’ll be back. I have nowhere else to sleep,” I lied. My home was still the same. I simply didn’t want her in it. I wanted to keep the scent of Braelynn where it belonged. Having Devon, there would tarnish it. Her heavy, flowery perfume would overpower Braelynn’s sweet, innocent scent.

  Devon leaned over the shift gear and puckered her lips for me to kiss again, wanting a more meaningful kiss. With one swift motion, I pressed my lips to hers, then shifted the transmission into drive. “I’ll be back.”

  I looked outside the car at the bellhop who was waiting to open the door for her. Devon climbed out and I drove off. I didn’t have a client who wanted to see me.

  I needed to see her again.

  At least one more time.

  I drove straight home and hopped in the all black BMW I had recently purchased as my stalking mobile. Yes, I had succumbed to stalking. I popped the glove box open and drew out my incognito disguise. With an old baseball cap covering my head, I drove slowly down Braelynn’s street. I circled her block four times until I found parking a couple of houses away.

  Moving the seat back until I was low enough to not be noticed, I waited for her to return home. An hour and a half had passed before a Prius stopped in front of her house. The back passenger door swung open and she climbed out. I watched as she stretched her arms above her head before she blew a kiss to the driver. Then she jogged up the steps, unlocking the door before she disappeared into her home. Despite her tears at Kennedy’s house, she seemed happy. I had to reassure myself repeatedly that she was happy. I was doing the right thing by letting her go. Our worlds had to stay apart.

  Once Gus said goodbye to the driver and headed inside, I pulled out of my parking spot and headed home.

  I sat in my office and looked at the night sky, sipping on the two fingers of malt scotch in my hand. Devon was the person I should be with. Our relationship was stable. She lived in DC and I didn’t have to worry that I’d push her into a relapse.

  When the clock read three in the morning, I found my way back to the hotel. Devon had surely fallen asleep by now and sex would be out of the picture. I took my clothes off, left them by the door and climbed into bed, wearing only my boxers and undershirt. She was asleep with her facemask across her eyes. Exhaling, I tossed until I found a comfortable position in the cold bed. This had become my life.

  Braelynn

  My fingers twirled the curl that hung over my shoulder. It was the eighth time I had fixed my hair. I scanned the person staring back at me in the mirror and tried to smile. Anxiety and nerves coursed through my body and my heart raced a mile a minute as I looked at the time on my phone. He would be here any minute now.

  Dumbfounded that I had agreed to this date, I caught myself chewing on the inside of my lip. Gus popped his head into the bathroom and distracted me yet again from calling Landon to cancel. His boyish grin grew as he looked me over.

  “You look hot, mama.” He tugged on my hand so I would twirl for him. “Why do you look so worried?” He released me and his forefinger pressed under my chin. Gus knew my thoughts without me saying them.

  “Maybe I should reschedule?” I contemplated for the tenth time tonight.

  “Baby girl, you’ve already rescheduled twice.” He held up two fingers.

  I had cancelled with Landon twice already. Both times I had used the excuse that I was stuck at the office. I swallowed the ball of nerves lodged in my throat and headed towards the living room. This wasn’t a date. It was two friends getting coffee.

  “Ugh.” I pulled away from his hand and tossed my makeup in my purse.

  Gus sashayed his way behind me and sat on the closed toilet lid. “He’ll be here in a few minutes. It’s too late to cancel. Not to mention, rude.” He crossed one leg over the other as he watched me get ready.

  “Gus, this is going to suck. I’m terrible at dating.”

  “You don’t suck. You and Haas hit it off right from the beginning.”

  “No! He and I liked to fuck and then it grew to something more.”

  Knock.

  Knock.

  Knock.

  “Well, love, put your big girl panties on and rip that Band-Aid off because he’s here!” he squealed.

  I yanked the front door open and was greeted by Landon’s charming smile and his delicious cologne. “Hi, you look gorgeous.” He leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on my cheek.

  “Thanks.” I looked down at my feet. Brushing my hair behind my ear, I felt the tingles i
n my burning face.

  Landon looked delectable in dark navy jeans, a black graphic T-shirt, and black jacket. Though spring was here the nights in Manhattan were still chilly. I grabbed my keys from the fish bowl and shut the door behind us.

  “Thank you for not canceling,” he said, pulling the car door open and winking at me.

  “I was stuck at work the other times.”

  “I’m just messing with you, Braelynn.” He chuckled and grasped my hand, placing a chaste kiss on it.

  God, he was sweet.

  I crawled into his sleek Mercedes and bit my lower lip. It wasn’t a top of the line or a fancy sports version. Just a Mercedes—the type most people had to work their asses off to afford.

  Landon fumbled with the radio until he found a station he liked. “Sorry, this isn’t my car. It’s a rental,” he said as though he thought I would judge him by what kind of car he drove.

  “It’s fine, trust me.” I smirked. “It’s better than my mode of transportation.” Thomas drove me around, but I didn’t want Landon to know I still held on to a part of Peyton, so I continued, “I get around Manhattan with public transportation and my legs.” My brain scattered as I tried to change the topic. “Is your car getting fixed?” I asked when he pulled off the curb.

  “Nah, nothing like that. I don’t have a car. I live in the city and I’m out of town so much it makes no sense to have it parked all the time.”

  “That’s smart.” I slid my hands over my thighs to calm my nerves. “Do you like what you do? I mean, playing baseball and all.”

  “I guess.” Landon lifted his shoulders. Pulling up at a red light, he looked over at me. “I’ve been playing since I was a kid. It comes second nature to me. The always being on the road though. I’m not a huge fan of that. It’s hard to build relationships when most of the year I’m in a different city.”

  I nodded at his statement, my fingers tangling together as I sat. I took my hands and braided them together over my legs unsure of what to do with them. I was a ball of nerves

  “Can I ask you a question?” he asked.

  “That was a question.” I smiled. “But sure.”